When I was a child, my parents and relatives would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up, and my answer was always the same: A Mad Scientist. The idea of creating bubbly concoctions and reviving the dead has always appealed to me. Sadly, Jow has not allowed me to experience my life long dream.
The game starts up excruciatingly slow, only to present you with an illegible menu of buttons that are impossible to see or press. Once you decipher the chicken scratch, or tap “Start Game” by accident, you are immediately deposited into an outdoor laboratory with absolutely no idea what to do. I started tapping objects that seemed important, but to no avail. I then realized that my butt-chinned scientist was actually standing on what could only perceived as an invisible skateboard, so I slid him up and down. Success! Actually, it was far from success. I had hoards of granny-zombies shuffling straight towards me. Doing what any aspiring mad scientist would do, I slid a beaker full of green potion across the table.